In honour of Cesarean awareness month ; 10 things they don’t tell you about c-sections.
I had an emergency c-section. After 22 hours of labour I had an emergency c-section.
Disappointment is the word that fits. But hey, we both made it out alive and that’s what counts.
I didn’t look anything up about c-sections while I was pregnant, I didn’t know anything about it.
So Oh human was I surprised during and after my c-section !
1. They are turning me inside out!
It’s the strangest feeling ever.
You feel no pain at all, but you feel hands inside your tummy.
You can actually feel them taking your bowels out, re-arranging your whole insides.
And that feeling when they get your baby out..
It’s the craziest most magical most freaky feeling in the world.
It’s like they just pulled out everything that was in your tummy.
It’s a little war inside of you that’s going on, and then: tada! Your gorgeous bundle of joy is there!
2. Your tummy remains numb
I expected some numbness around the scar, but for my whole tummy underneath to be numb? Nop. I’m 17 months post partum now and some feeling has come back, but most of it is still numb.
3. Your numb tummy will get an unscratchable itch
Okay ladies, how annoying is that itch that can’t get scratched?
It’s like ants running underneath your skin, taunting you.
On the list of most annoying things in the world, THIS should be number 1.
If someone has the solution against this: let me know!
4. People will actually tell you how lucky you are
For some weird reason people will tell you how lucky you are to not have ‘your vagina ruined’.
Okay first off: I didn’t want a c-section, I wanted a natural delivery really bad.
Second: my ‘vagina might not be ruined’ but my whole stomach was cut open and sewed back shut, which means I now to this day still hurt when I train my abdominal muscles. Plus I got a scar.
I also have a little lovely c-section shelf. Does your vagina have a shelf? DIDN’T THINK SO.
5. You can be in pain for weeks
Holy s%^t, was I in pain those first weeks ! It was not just my stomach, I was also really hurt in my back because those muscles had to keep me upright now instead of my abdominal muscles.
I was so weak that I could barely stand up long enough to wash my daughter.
I would stand there shaking scared to drop her because I felt so weak. Luckily I got help from my parents those first weeks.
6. The first time you walk..
The first time you walk is extremely weird because suddenly you don’t have those abdominal muscles anymore.
And you only realise how important they are when you get them cut into pieces.
You will feel like you will fall flat on your face.
My belly felt like falling on the ground, like nothing was holding it.
The first couple of weeks I would walk around holding my belly.. scared it would rip open and fall off like in some freak accident.
7.You might get traumatized
I am still to this day traumatized.
My emergency c-section wasn’t anything out of the ordinary, but it was traumatizing to me.
Being strapped to the table, all those people around me.
Getting cut open and your baby pulled out.
My arms were tied so I couldn’t even hold her when she was born. And we all know how precious those first minutes are. It still breaks my heart.
Not being able to properly care for your baby those first weeks( I didn’t give her first bath, the nurses did 🙁 )
Your dream of a natural birth being shattered..
To this day I still can not touch my c-section scar. It repulses me and I get nauseous.
8. You might get tied down
I was tied down like some lunatic that would otherwise walk away while being numb? Because that is apparently possible?
9. Coughing, sneezing or laughing feels like dying.
Yes, no overreacting, but coughing, sneezing or laughing will make you feel like you are dying.
After laughing I was convinced my stomach had ripped back open and I was about to die.
10. You might feel like a faillure
I felt like a faillure because I didn’t have a natural birth.
My labor was induced ( no epidural!) first with a balloon, which got me to 6cm, then pitocin ALL THE WAY UP. Having contractions from the start only minutes apart, my water getting broken.. I stayed at 6cm the whole time. 22Hours long.
So an emergency c-section was the way to go. My daughter’s heartbeat started acting up, I was freaked out by it, so cut me open it is.
After all of that, doubt had the guts to creep up on me and tell me I was a failure.
Well, f$^ùk you doubt, I am not a failure, none of us c-section mommies are.
We are bad ass moms who let ourselves get cut open for our babies.
Did you have a c-section? What was the biggest surprise for you? Let me know in the comments!